Fifth Standard

When it comes to making a list you have standards. You know that characters that wear less clothes, or get wet, or better naked, are going to gain more favor. Characters that are confident and strong are also going to score better, but also, those that meet the Fifth standard which is be a heroine. A heroine is a lead female character that actively fights against the antagonist or against an oppressive system.

Diana Palmer ‘The Phantom’ Kristy Swanson

They must of strapped her down some to Keep her C-cups under wraps, through the movie she was wearing extra layers and covered up. Too bad Catherine Zeta-Jones Stole every scene she was in with her.

Jenny Blake ‘The Rocketeer’ Jennifer Connelly

Disney didn’t want to use real life Betty Page for the Movie, not just because of the sexual over tones but because she was still alive. We Got Jennifer Connelly and I think we’re better for it. She was in a number of outfits, even fought against her captures, but Jenny was invented for the movie.

Mary Jane Watson ‘Spider-Man’ Kirsten Dunst

Peter Parker’s on again off again romance. She was active in her life, but passive against any antagonist in the film often playing the captive damsel.

Top Ten Movie/TV Heroine

The Break down of how this works.

Okay, this will be similar to my other top ten lists of comic book heroins I’ve done before for DC Comics, Marvel Comics and Indy Comics. So here’s my standards. No underage characters or actresses, which takes out Hit-Girl, and the C-cup minimum cuts out more ladies than you think. My third standard is I’m only allowed to judge based on the show or movie, on set pictures. The downside of this rule is that it will skew things for those with a larger body of work as that character, as well as the actress with the larger bra. This is my list, deal with it or make your own list. My forth standard I will prove here. No single episode characters on this list. All must have a movie or multiple TV episodes.

Maxima Eve Torres

She didn’t even get to enjoy the whole episode of Supergirl when wrestler Eve Torres appeared as Maxima.

Maxima Charlotte Sullivan

Charlotte Sullivan had no trouble appearing as the Queen of Almerac but honestly spent half her time on her episode of Smallville sucking face. I guess when one of those faces is Tom Welling you don’t mind so much. In 2 days The fifth standard.

Judy Landers

I wanted to do a segment on the Woman that Sang the song Tits and Ass in the Show Chorus Line, but at a B-Cup I couldn’t touch her, but her Sister thought she was an enhanced C-cup and also posed with her in Playboy. No nudity, but still she was a happy memory form the 80’s, lots of TV and some film work.

The Makings of a Bimbo

I have been working on how to be describe how an entry earns this tag. It is not a measure of promiscuity. It is not a measure of breast size, though implants play a part. It is not a measure of confidence. When I think of a bimbo confidence is the opposite of what they have.

Long hair of any color way past the shoulder and porn star level makeup.

They need to feel worshiped and loved, there is a hollowness that they are trying to fill and being loved and admire for their appearance plays a part. They have to have some plastic surgery, though it doesn’t have to be implants. The plastic surgery, could of been liposuction, having a rib removed, lip fillers, having their nose shaved to remove a bump, buttock implants. They have to look overly made up. They have to look too perfect. You almost mistake them for something Photoshoped. They are always in the littlest amount of clothes, though not always naked. They wear make-up to the pool. Even when not wearing heels their foot some to take on an arch as if they still were in heels. And in their eyes, there is a broken sex doll quality to them. A vacant stare that often looks puzzled. They are often submissive, but always start out in the real world as something that isn’t a real woman, and yet is still before you and as real as anyone else. They normally have all their pubic hair removed. The tramp stamp tattoo is optional.

Aletta Ocean is the personification of being a Bimbo. She has ha multiple plastic surgeries over her career as a porn star and always wears heavy makeup. While Below, Angela White similar in every way isn’t a bimbo. She naturally has big boobs, loves sex and rarely wears heavy makeup. Most importantly no plastic surgery.

What a bimbo is truly, a manifestation of pure sexual desire. either by the viewer or the viewed. She either wants to let go of all of the difficulties and challenges of life so that another, man or woman can keep her in a comfortable life or whomever she is with wants a partner that can only satisfy their sexual wants and no other aspect of their relationship. I know this sounds anti-bimbo, but personally I like them in fantasy only. In reality is it a whole different complication that can only make a relationship harder. But we aren’t here for that. We’re here for the titillation.

In the end, what is hot, will be posted bimbo or not. I will endeavor to keep things a blend of ladies who are either blessed or can afford to look like they are gifted and always Breast Centric.

A Good Titter

Boobs are funny and often the punchline of a good joke.

Distracted by the castle’s large door knockers the Doctor is misunderstood.

Needing to leave in a hurry Max instructs Caroline.

When Sheldon asks why Penny is there to Help Leonard get tenure.

I’m a sucker for a pun.

At Double D it is too late for the late Lynda Wiesmeier.

Homer is a Definite boob man.

Can we Get Katie Perry mad at Sesame Street again?

Made this one myself.

Weapons of Mass distraction

A Benny Hill Classic.

Shake It Up Baby

Padding Things Further. Kaki Turner, Bounced her way with her Air and Water filled breast to much Comedic effect in Defaming a Politician in Florida in 1954, Porky’s 2 The Next Day. It may have been over the top, but when you’re hoping to defame someone and cause a scene big giant bouncing tits help.

Padding Their Work

Sometimes a Woman Pads her Bra. Some consider this deception. I am going to cover the not hiding illegal stuff in Bra moments. Now sometimes this is done when a young girl wishes she was as developed as her friends.

This is What Happens to Young Bella Thorne in Blended, but with Gel Insoles.

Or it is don’t to Impress a Man, which is needed when Grace needs to impress a man, yet punctures her water bra for Great Comedic effect.

Sometimes This is Done to Mock another that is More Blessed than her. This is Caroline Wozniacki making fun of Serrena Williams in the middle of a match.

Sometimes an Actress is just filling out to make herself fit the role. From Movie Greats of Julia Roberts Filling out for Erin Brockovich To Angelina Jolie Filling things out for Her Roll as Lara Croft.

Then there are times where the Character needs to be ample, not to look like another, but to cover a plot point to her character of the story the movie is telling. Leslie Mann, a Very Funny Actress, was playing a Character in Adam Sandler’s movie Big Daddy. The Character had once worked at a Hooters restaurant so she admitted to padding herself for the role.

In the Movie Inside Man, One of the Bank robbers had to be of similar size to one of the other female tellers So she could Utter the line. So I Violated statute Double D. Here we Have Kim Director Filling in that Role.

TV has this Happen too as a Young Cast Member finally finds love nestled in the bosom of a young an curvaceous Hunter King who is now set to be a regular on TV’s Life in Pieces. Especially with her padded pair.

I will Give you one Last one just before leaving thought I am still working on another. Sometimes they Are So padded as to be intentionally over the top.

Here is Ursala Udders from A Dirty Shame Played by Selma Blair.

Phantom Lady

1 Phantom Lady

DC Comics bought out this Indy Book and thankfully she has seen print with in the time Frame. allowing her to take the top spot. Having always had a skimpy outfit you might wounder why she would have Darkness based powers when it is clear that she wants to be seen. Maybe she got extra points because I came across her at a time in my youth. But that’s My list. Where’s yours?

Angela

Granted Her point of Origin is an Indy book, and she has appeared in her own title and is certainly still in comics thanks to her Creator suing Todd McFarlane for the rights to his creation and then selling her to Marvel. Marvel is now Publishing Angela and billing her as Thor’s Lost sister. And Yes I like Neil Gaiman enough to give her the Number 2 spot.

Witchblade

5 Witchblade

Female Police office finds magical gauntlet that can make a protective armor. If the armor covered her more that would take longer to draw and in the interest of sales and publishing on time, the outfit was always skimpy. And Damn if the Cosplayers don’t show this character some love.

Ghost

6 Ghost

She is at the edge of the 5 year gap, but Ghost from Darkhorse still comes to the number 6 spot. Thanks to her low neckline costume and sometimes waking up naked having accidentally phased out of her clothes proves she’s still a winner in my book. The Adam Hughes art is what put her comfortable at number 6.

Painkiller Jane

9 Painkiller Jane

At this Rate you might think I have a thing for red heads, but this fiery redhead is basically the Punisher with the disability of not feeling pain. This is an actual problem for many people but this comic uses it as an excuse for her to wear skimpy outfits so she can get any bullets she’s been shot with removed.

Cassie Hack

Honorable Mention

To help illustrate the weighing process I give you our only honorable mention, Cassie Hack from the Team or Duo book of Hack/Slash. Last published in 2015. She meets all of the criteria. One the first score she often wears very little, but those is more to draw out the monsters she hunts as well as for eye candy of her male readership. She is the daughter of a serial killer and committed matricide in her first act to ride the world of serial killers and is the basis of her title. She lacks in the size category which cost her some points, but the final part was persona. Which took her off the list. She is likely to beat you to a pulp than beat your meat.

Red Sonja

And Lastly a Final Clarifier. For a Comic book Heroine to truly be Indy, her first comic must be not Marvel or DC. For that reason alone. We loose Red Sonja. She first appeared in a Conan comic that was published by Marvel at the time. She is not owned by Marvel now thought which is why she is still a Dynamite Gal. This also means, they Can’t start in Non-Comic Properties Like Lara Croft.

Razor

Next on our List is Razor and she is her to point one of of the few reasons why an Indy Comic can loose some point for a character that might be on this list. When she was first published Razor was a Black and White Comic. And I even owned a print of the top image, but she could still not be on this list as her last comic was 2010.

Red Monika

The Decisions on the list are purely based on my own opinion. If you have thoughts about my list Contact me. The Weight for each one chose on the list are the same as the other two lists. Exposure, Size and disposition. All of which Red Monika has in Spades from Her Team Book Battle Chasers, Which was last published in 2001. She may have the Curves of Jessica Rabbit, but she clearly lacks the staying power in the industry. Speak of Staying Power, How do those clothes stay on?